Esteemed colleagues...
we have made an astonishing discovery.
Deep in the jungles of a remote island
in the heart of the Andaman sea...
we believe we have found definitive proof
of a heretofore unknown Apex Predator.
I had long suspected this to be true.
But with this...we may well rewrite history!

Awww yeah it’s the ORIGINAL — his designation is Classic
You're just a victim in a pickle, like a jar full o’ Vlassic.
Underestimate his power ‘cause those teeth are plastic
He will tear down your World, and then rename it Jurassic
If you didn't know before it's time to get off the Shortbus
Buy some new pants 'cause your piss made them porous
Bow to the King, and sing his name out in chorus
You survive at the mercy of the Raimisaurus.

Thank the heavens he's a heavy with a heart that’s heroic
Can't be swayed by a dollar or some doe-eyed ho chick
Strong-forged like steel, unaffected like a Stoic
He was swimin’ in volcanoes in the pre-Mesozoic
Got a lightspeed flow, there is no way to outpace this
Dropping bars like bones, so you can call him loquacious
kickin' FAT beats, 'cause his mind is so spacious
Ruling this rhyme just like he conquered the Cretaceous

Genetic Superman in his little Metropolis
Spewing down fire, ‘cause my boy spits phosphorous
Call the undertaker ‘cause you’ll need a sarcophogus
Veggie ladykiller, like a Parasaurolophus
Total freak of nature and a master adapter
he rapped and slapped and snapped...and then he tapped her
A Pteradon? A Megalodon? Velociraptor?
He played while they perished, then wrote the new chapter
Get on your knees, sinner, and swear to adore us
Be you Scorpio or Gemini, a Cancer or Taurus
Astrologically, the stars say who is for us and
God help you if it’s Retrograde in Raimisaurus

Catch you in his grip and feel him sink that vise in
Triceratops charging like a three-horned bison
Dilophosaurus spittin hot rhymes like ricin
Chewin’ on his foes like Holyfield fed Tyson
Asteroid extinction if you ever try to rhyme this
Immune to your shit like he was made in your thymus gland.
Damn! Moves so fast the kid is timeless as he
tramples you in a seconds like a herd of Gallimimus

To anyone listening...please...
do NOT attempt entry at the given co-ordinates.
We captured a specimen. But it came at a terrible price.
Many good men and women were lost.
To contain it. To study it. But now...it broke free...
and is loosed upon the world.
Dear God...have mercy on us all.

Fighting and biting and writing rhymes so exciting that
You’ll never see it coming when he strikes you like lightning
He is tiny but frightening, got no teeth that need whitening,
Blind you with that grin, just like the Buddha — enlightening,
His effects? Complex! He will feast on false respects
Watch him hunt down these clowns and scream out Who’s Next?
All you quitters can’t be bitter when you’re watching him flex
He needs a BAD babysitter or a nanny T-Rex
You call yourself a tank
and that your name means Ankylo
You’re mammoth in proportion,
so they say that you’re Brachio
Got a head like a wrecking ball,
it’s Pachyo-sephalo
But none of you can spit,
you’re just bitches that swallow

Think you’re competition, but you really set the low bar.
Turn out the lights, and he’s like Batman with sonar
Hungry like the wolf, well how you likin’ him so far?
Tell your next of kin they’d better check the OR
Concentrated confidence and natural pride, yo
Cuddles like a kitten with the lion inside, yo
Smells you when he tells you there’s no place to hide, yo
Gut you like a fish and make your backbone slide OHHHH

Tune in to his station - pledge allegiance to his nation
Get another student loan and then a thorough education
If you pray to be saved, then ask the gods of creation
if reincarnation can fix your mental castration
He’s a junior Godzilla, got the instincts of a killer,
he stomps and chomps and romps, like Jackson doin’ thriller
Got a jones for digging bones and catching fuzzy caterpillar
If you bribe to survive? His favourite flavour is vanilla

And it’s only just beginning, it’s the start of his reign
Beat you down like Sandman with his singapore cane
Like Roosevelt he’s speaking soft but bringing the pain
Yeah he’s my big stick boy, with an even bigger brain!
You cannot face this foe with bombs or even a thesaurus
We warned you time and time again, but still you ignored us
You denied, and lied, and cried...and shit, then you bored us
So now you learn what happens...
when you f@#$ with Raimisaurus